:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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