Sorry, I don't speak sober.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize