Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
