my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize