Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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