Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
