..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Randomize
