hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
