every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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