I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
