We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
