Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Randomize
