Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Randomize
