Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Randomize
