Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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