He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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