Is it because I queefed?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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