Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Sex in the backyard? Check.
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