Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
We smell like vodka and hangover
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
