i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
she told me i tasted like america
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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