i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
