I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
