No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
We talked him into tasing himself.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
