My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Oh god it's open bar.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
