Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
