I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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