Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Randomize
