I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize
