Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
