i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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