So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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