Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize