so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
