Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
