my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
