have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
