I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
