OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize