I accidentally had phone sex last night
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
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