Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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