I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
