I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
found the other keg... it's in the tree
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
