He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
