my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
