Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
only if we run a train.
done.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
