I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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