yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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