we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
