she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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