My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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