i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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