allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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