I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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